The Joys of RuNet!

[peacetraveler22]

How can I ever leave the Russian blogosphere when I receive amusing and thought provoking comments like this! :)

"Странная женщина. 42 почти года, мужа нет. Работы, видимо, толковой тоже, иначе не каталась бы по самым дешевым билетам в Москву. Детей нет. Чего в жизни добилась-то? Русский кое-как выучила, чтоб русского мужчину найти? Так они давно разобраны, у них уже дети школу заканчивают. При этом гонор ого-го какой. Высокомерно поучает, хотя в сущности пишет банальности и глупости. Вам бы к психотерапевту, тётенька."

Btw, I never see the single male bloggers on LJ being harassed or criticized for not being married. Why is that? Is it only shameful for an older woman to be single in Russian culture, but okay for men to remain unmarried and childless? My life is worthless! I don't have a Russian man...how can I survive? :)

Pleasant weekend to all!

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Living Child Free

Comments

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

Yes, it's so sad. I have never once felt any social pressure (from family or friends) in the U.S. for being single and not having children. Completely different mentality and culture. Yes, I agree it's very important to have babies to ensure our population doesn't die out, but there are plenty of people doing it so I'm not concerned. And IMHO there are definitely other ways to contribute to society and leave an impression in the world other than popping out babies.

[rankin-almst500.livejournal.com]

Shannon, a couple of months ago I've tried to tell the same to one well known journalist who thinks that women like you are abnormal...)

http://irek-murtazin.livejournal.com/1305486.html?thread=54955406#t54955406

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you for the link! I will read the comments there because I think they will make my brain explode. I see already that the author thinks a woman should be married and having babies by age 25! :) What a horrible conclusion he made in the post that a woman at her age is a "bad character" because she wasn't married and was childless. Shameful mindset! Maybe I will have a child in the next 2 - 3 years, who knows? With modern medicine, it's still possible.

[rankin-almst500.livejournal.com]

I think his position can be partially explained: he is ethnic Tatar from Tatarstan, and a Moslem (I think) ...

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

I think I will visit Tatarstan during my journey next month. It will be my first time there.

[south-of-broad.livejournal.com]

All the cliches and banalities are still very much in use in post-Soviet territory. You cannot convince them that it has been your choice. You just can't. So don;t waste your energy and time.

[vasionok.livejournal.com]

You can, but they won't agree it was a good choice.

[south-of-broad.livejournal.com]

Well, it means you can't) There is no acceptance of the alternative and it is very sad.

[vasionok.livejournal.com]

Russians are being Russian, this is so sad ;-)

[vasionok.livejournal.com]

This lack of social pressure is very typical of US. Tells something about the lack of social cohesion. People are more distant, more independent, even within the family. That's sad, I think.

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

I can't agree with you on this point. I'm extremely close with my family, see them constantly, almost every weekend I spend with my parents and sister. I don't see any correlation with social pressure to marry. If you are close with your family, and they support you, they will also support your choices in life. They will not try to mold you into something you do not wish to be (a wife, a mother, etc.). Pressure to be something you are not is not a sign of "closeness" or good familial relations.

[vasionok.livejournal.com]

What if you choose to be a cocaine addict? Or something else equally terrible? Wouldn't it make it different?

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

Being single vs. being a cocaine addict aren't comparable! The former is not life threatening. :)

[vasionok.livejournal.com]

It threatens the life of your kids, so to speak, which is not that different. At least there is a lot of disagreement on how different it is. Even in US you can see people who are anti-abortion, anti-contraception, and possibly even (pardon me) anti-masturbation. Instead, they are preaching for procreation. Isn't it so? Catholics, may be? I think we are not so different after all.