peacetraveler22: (Default)
peacetraveler22 ([personal profile] peacetraveler22) wrote2015-10-01 10:32 pm

Discrimination against the childless!

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America is a country of convenience, but for whom? In Virginia, we're having torrential rains the past few days, but this doesn't stop me from doing ordinary chores. A woman still has to eat, even in the pouring rain. After a very long day in the office, I drove to a crowded new grocery store. I had no umbrella, so my tired eyes began searching for a parking space near the entrance so I wouldn't get even more wet. Then I saw this sign!! Right beside the handicapped spaces in each parking aisle are two reserved spots for "Customers with Children." Why? Tell me please why I should have to park further away, carry my heavy bags a longer distance, and get soaking wet just because I'm childless? Being a parent is suddenly a handicap, worthy of a special parking spot?

Then I went inside the store and saw delicious cookies being offered by "Harry the Happy Dragon." But for kids only. What happens if I decide to take one? Will the dragon breathe fire at me? :)

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Do you think parents should have special parking spaces? I don't. I'm sure being a parent is one of the most rewarding and life changing events in a human's life, but with this choice also comes a new set of responsibilities, joys and inconveniences. One of them includes taking much longer to leave the house, board the car and leave it, especially when dealing with an infant. I've done it many, many times with young relatives and my nephew. Such is life...

I love children, but don't think parenthood should equal special and favorable treatment. Not at the grocery store and definitely not in the workplace. How about airplanes, and the nightmare of having an unruly and screaming child near you? Of course, we've all experienced it and in such situations I'm usually very calm and sympathetic as long as the parent tries to correct the child's behavior. Should single people and solo travelers have a "child free" cabin, so they can rest in peace during long flights? :) Personally, I think this idea is ridiculous.

Do you have these special parking spaces for parents at Russian stores?

[identity profile] new-forester.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:17 am (UTC)(link)
It's probably good for their business to appeal to customers with children in this way, and it's their private lot, they can set their own rules. However, I doubt these signs are enforceable. If you park there, what are they going to do?
OTOH, if I were you, I'd stop patronizing this business, as a matter of principle. If they make you feel unwelcome, why return there?

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:36 pm (UTC)(link)
They are not enforceable. :) It's not like a handicap spot, where this an over $100 fine for parking w/out the proper handicap tag. I've only seen this type of "child" parking in a few places. Now I'm living in 100% suburbia. There are almost no single people here, all families. It's very strange for me because I previously lived in an area where there were mostly single professional people. So, it's just a life and mentality adjustment to go back to the burbs. :)

[identity profile] berngardovka.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:26 am (UTC)(link)
We don't have , but it is not a bad idea

I just realize why we have seats in a public transport
When you are with the child , you should carry your bags, child's bags or toys and carry and hold a child
And it is difficult!

So than less time I should walk on parking than less risk of that I will not hold a hand and he we run and something happened

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, it's a pain. I've done it many times, and even now that my nephew is older. Carrying soccer equipment, balls, knee pads, snacks for after the game...but this is part of the responsibility that comes with being a parent.

[identity profile] leo-sosnine.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:35 am (UTC)(link)
Pretty obvious, hard to tell why are you ranting. Having children is a serious financial and time wasting burden for parents. It impacts both your career and financial posture. In the end they get barely any benefit for their suffering, but government gets another citizen to pay taxes, to serve in military etc. Any country is as strong as its citizens are and a country with not enough citizens will quickly become a victim of other countries.

I say, currently there aren't enough benefits for parents in America and it's still financially inviable, but government still wins because many parents enjoy parenting by other means than money, specifically, by evolutionary human nature design, especially in women, causing them to "want" to have children and enjoy babysitting by manipulating their behavior.

As of now, it's not financially viable to have children in the US and childless are society's freeriders.

[identity profile] porosenok-aust.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:26 pm (UTC)(link)
But it is your own problem whether you want children or not.
Yes, it is expensive.
But why other people should pay for it. They will pay for their own children if they want.

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[identity profile] linamay.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:38 am (UTC)(link)
I have two kids and I think it's reasonable, it's dangerous and stressful walking with two kids and pushing a cart all over the parking lot.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:39 pm (UTC)(link)
The main benefit of the spaces is safety, not convenience. On this point I agree. It lessens the likelihood that a child will run out and get hit by a car. And no store wants to incur liability for such an incident.

[identity profile] seadevil001.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
it will be better if such spots will be around shopping carts parking areas. So when one stuff children in the car on top of groceries he/she can drop off cart fast, before little monsters start crawling out of windows. 8-)
In MA I saw such signs only at Cabela's store and it did not strike me as a good idea.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:40 pm (UTC)(link)
They aren't very common in Virginia either. Only in areas of deep suburbia, where about 80% of residents having one or more children.

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[identity profile] mybmd.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:12 am (UTC)(link)
Ha! I always take a cookie. :}

[identity profile] vitsky.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 06:18 am (UTC)(link)
If you feel like a child - why not. ;)
The sign says "kids of all ages". You can be a kid from 0 to 99 (and more), and no one should stop you.)

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[identity profile] juan-gandhi.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:46 am (UTC)(link)
My daughter has three children. It's not easy. I'd rather leave the space close by to those who have more problems than just rolling back the cart too far from the car.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I agree, parenthood can be a big pain in the ass. It takes a lot of effort, time and patience but I hope the rewards outweigh these burdens. However, having children is a choice. I get tired of listening to parents complain about their lack of freedom and time after having them.

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[identity profile] selfmade.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 05:02 am (UTC)(link)
Tell me please why I should have to park further away, carry my heavy bags a longer distance, and get soaking wet just because I'm physically intact?

[identity profile] south-of-broad.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 07:46 am (UTC)(link)
You don't need to carry anything there are carts available . Walking is good for you.

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[identity profile] e-g-o-r-i-u-s.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 05:37 am (UTC)(link)
Shannon, but there was no prohibition for you to take a cookie - they are proposed for kids of all ages!

And these parking spots - it's not a discrimination of childless, no, it's a positive discrimination of parents.

[identity profile] zhang-fei.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:51 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, and that period when blacks had been segregated wasn't discrimination of black people, that was a positive discrimination of white people, so that they could feel slightly more comfortable without those blacks in their backyards.

[identity profile] notfop.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
In Russia,there is only one official warning sign under the main sign for the Parking area is a "disabled sign". Any other type of warning signs are on the banned list.

Так легко нас не взять

[identity profile] andrey-kaminsky.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 06:36 am (UTC)(link)
I think if the government is trying to excel seeking ways how to ban people using condoms and the internet, then these people perceive questions about parking as insignificant :)

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[identity profile] alexeykostylev.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 07:00 am (UTC)(link)

Usually the are parking slots for disabled as well. Do you want to ask "why shoulg you get wet just because you are not disabled"?

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:47 pm (UTC)(link)
No, the disabled are physically impaired...in wheelchairs, or very elderly. Parents are typically younger and completely healthy. I don't think there is any correlation between the two.

[identity profile] dkfl.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 07:18 am (UTC)(link)
Russia is for childless.
Because you have to to carry only a few heavy bags, not extra screaming "gimme this toy!" 20+kg :)

I like this sort of "discrimination" :)

[identity profile] maadmike.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 07:25 am (UTC)(link)
I don't remmember nothing like this in Russia. But with the birth of a child a man becomes a very milch cow. So, maybe the owner of the grosery just want to show how he likes this perspective? Its like our army should make sign - "Thank you for the son pal, free vacation for year for your priceless baby".

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:03 pm (UTC)(link)
A business should be free to conduct their business as they wish. I agree. I was just in a bad mood yesterday, and felt it necessary to complain. :)

[identity profile] south-of-broad.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 07:43 am (UTC)(link)
Have you tried to load the car with the toddler in your hands? Have you tried to do the same in the rain?

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, many times. It's difficult!

[identity profile] yarowind.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 08:46 am (UTC)(link)
>>Right beside the handicapped spaces in each parking aisle are two reserved spots for "Customers with Children."

Good idea.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:03 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sure all parents like it. Makes their lives much easier.

[identity profile] -kysya.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 09:59 am (UTC)(link)
It's just safety. Parent&child parking have more room between spaces (same as disabled parking) to allow to put a buggy and safely take a child out of the car. They are closer to the shop for other drivers' convenience - no one likes when child or mum with a buggy jumps in front of your car! And cookies... You had your chance for a free cookies, free sweets, free entries to the zoo, discounted bus and cinema tickets, etc. when you were a kid. Now it's other generation's turn :)

[identity profile] porosenok-aust.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:32 pm (UTC)(link)
Isn't it enough to make kiddish design?
Not many adults would want this cookie, anyway, but there is no discrimination.

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[identity profile] mb-b.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 11:40 am (UTC)(link)
One of these days I ought to write a post about how these US of A discriminate against the non-driver. (And it's perfectly legal in most cases.)

Here's one of more benign examples: Do you know any stores in your area that aren't accessible other than by car? I do. They're located on a divided highway with no access from the back streets, and it's technically illegal to walk or cycle on the shoulder even for a hundred feet. No bus stops there either.

[identity profile] modest-so-zvesd.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 11:49 am (UTC)(link)
Shannon, do you know that people in the Soviet Union had a tax on childlessness?
Married childless women 45 and unmarried childless men 20-45 pay this tax

[identity profile] porosenok-aust.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:35 pm (UTC)(link)
and so do modern americans.
As two totally equal families will pay different taxes, only if they have different number of children.
But it's obvious that a family with kids consume more public goods than totally equal family without kids.

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[identity profile] a-nimaida.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:11 pm (UTC)(link)
I hate the behavior of some young mothers. They require public attention to their children. It was as if only they know how to give birth to children))

At work was a woman who always talked about his children. It's horrible! All employees have children. Only she talks about her children while working. Tired of it all.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:07 pm (UTC)(link)
It's very, very annoying! This is why I lost contact with almost all of my female friends from school. Each time I went to lunch with them, they spoke only about children, school, doctor's appointments, and the kid's behavior. They have no interests outside of being a mother, yet they are all happy. So good for them. :) But I need more diverse interests and hobbies to keep me sane.

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hehehe

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Re: hehehe

[identity profile] a-nimaida.livejournal.com - 2015-10-04 21:44 (UTC) - Expand

:p

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Re: :p

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uti-puti

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Re: uti-puti

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[identity profile] porosenok-aust.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:41 pm (UTC)(link)
I used to be in the hotel in Turkey where was a pop corn only for kids.
First, the price for kids is much less than for adults.
Also, parents just asked their kids to bring pop corn for them.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:08 pm (UTC)(link)
At a resort, there are a lot of special programs for kids. It was the same on the cruise I took to Alaska. This is okay. It gives parents a rest on their vacation, and the resort or cruise staff can entertain the children for a little while. But a grocery store is something different. This is not a resort, but an ordinary chore in life. :)

Just get an umbrella and drop it in your car.

[identity profile] pin-gwin.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 12:54 pm (UTC)(link)
Recently I saw reserved parking spot for wounded vets, next to disabled. I don't care. We are parking our vehicles far from entrance, just to save their sides from dings and children scratches.

Re: Just get an umbrella and drop it in your car.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:10 pm (UTC)(link)
I always have an umbrella in my car, but I recently moved and it got misplaced. Now there's one there again, so I will be more calm next time. Yesterday was just a shitty day in general, so I wanted to complain. :)

[identity profile] iiiypmah.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 02:52 pm (UTC)(link)
zavidui molcha

[identity profile] qi-tronic.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Yes, it's a very good idea.
It's not only about convenience but also about safety.

No, we don't have the same in Russia (as far as I know) because here the culture of using cars is just developing.
But we have special seats in metro for people with children, elders, disabled and for pregnant women.
Also people are advised to give their seats to those categories.

I personally think that the older you get the more you would think about children and proclaim your childless status just because subconsciously you know that you made a wrong decision to not have them.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:11 pm (UTC)(link)
No, there is no wrong decision not to have them. I value freedom too much, and with a child there is no freedom, especially in the early years. You sacrifice a portion of your life to raise them if you're a good parent. And I'm surrounded by kids all the time. It's enough for me. The desire for my own has never been there, and it has not suddenly arisen. :)

[identity profile] jgofri.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 03:37 pm (UTC)(link)
So you don't care if someone has a lot more difficult time getting from the car to the store and back. You are wondering why the other people care at all.
Well, I have one more explanation for you, besides some very valid ones above.
It is for the same reason that someone might offer you a jump if your car battery dies on you in the middle of a dark parking lot.
Same reason someone might call the police if they see you being attacked.
Same reason someone might offer you their hand to help you up if you trip and fall.
That reason is basic human kindness.

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Of course I care if someone is physically disabled, or their car breaks down. These are not the same as being a parent. I believe in human kindness. :)

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[identity profile] dc66.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:25 pm (UTC)(link)
In France I see such signs quite often. Well, I'm childless, and I don't really care about it. It's not a problem for me to walk extra 100 - 200 meters, even if it's raining. Maybe 50 years later it will be the problem for me:)

Yes, childfree cabin is a dream!:)

[identity profile] peacetraveler22.livejournal.com 2015-10-02 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Childfree cabin will never happen, but it does take a lot of patience to deal with these annoyances on a plane. I do not care or become irritated with crying or fussiness, but I grow angry when a child constantly kicks my seat from behind!

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