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peacetraveler22
About five years ago, a hot Ukrainian lifeguard started working at my apartment pool. I was in my mid-30's at the time, and he was only 18. Yet one day he swam up to me, flashed his charming smile, and we chatted for a very long time. I think he had absolutely no clue how old I was, but it didn't really matter. We instantly had great and deep conversations, about a wide range of topics, and remain close friends to this day.
I remember vividly something he told me about his lifeguard training before he arrived to the USA to participate in the work/travel program. The instructors informed the male lifeguards that American women are different, that sexual harassment laws in the U.S. are strict, and that a man can easily be convicted for flirtatious advances that would be considered ordinary and acceptable in other cultures. I don't know where all this paranoia comes from, but I want to explain briefly how sexual harassment laws work in America. Because the instructors were totally wrong. The most important lesson for the day - don't be afraid to talk to an American woman, compliment her, flirt with her, or ask her out....trust me, you will not be jailed for such actions. :))
First, sexual harassment laws mostly protect women and men in the workplace, not every day life situations. There are both Federal and State laws. In general, there are two types of sexual harassment actionable under U.S. law: (1) "quid pro quo" - this is an offer from a supervisor to receive a promotion, higher salary, or career advancement in exchange for sexual favors, or a threat of demotion if the subordinate refuses his advances; (2) "hostile work environment" - this is the more popular ground for a sexual harassment lawsuit. Women sometimes complain their work environment is "hostile" because the boss is a goat, jerk, looks at her in a sexual way, etc.
However, mere allegations of this type of behavior will never be enough to prevail in a sexual harassment lawsuit in America. The standard of proof for the Plaintiff is very, very high, and evidence must be documented and ongoing. In other words, the behavior must usually be repetitive to win a sexual harassment lawsuit. Victims need to have written documentation, witnesses, and sometimes even psychological reports to verify the impact the harassment has had on them. Without this, it's unlikely any judge or jury will find the person's work environment to be "hostile." Of course, strange cases always slip through the cracks and judges and juries sometimes get it wrong.
"Quid pro quo" is much easier to prove if there is written documentation. Obviously, if your boss is stupid enough to send an email or leave a voice mail message saying something like "fuck me, and you'll get the promotion..." he is pretty much screwed. And not in the way he wishes. :)
The public misunderstands the high burden on a person to prove sexual harassment. It takes a lot to convince a judge or jury that an employer's conduct transcended ordinary office nastiness or flirtation into illegal harassment. The Supreme Court once held that these laws are not a "general civility code for the American workplace." They are meant to protect people from flagrant and obvious violations by superiors.
Before I became a lawyer, I worked at a big law firm as a receptionist. How many jerks did I have to deal with? A lot. Numerous businessmen would come to the front desk to check in for meetings, comment on me and my co-workers physical appearance, even say things like "nice tits", etc. Did I drag each of them into court? No. :) Mostly because I don't care if men make these remarks in passing. I simply ignore them, but if they continued for a long period of time, or the men routinely touched me in an inappropriate manner, I would file a complaint with my employer. I assume it's the same in Russia? I doubt it's acceptable for a boss to be touching a woman's ass, stroking her hair or making suggestive comments in the workplace. And the same for a female boss behaving sexually toward a male subordinate.
A reader recently sent me a story about a Russian born scientist who came to work at an American university. He met a young, beautiful subordinate and instantly fell in love with her. He asked her out several times, and she refused. In total, he made four verbal attempts to date her. After this rejection, the scientist wrote the young beauty a letter, documenting his intense feelings and begging again for a relationship with her. The letter was the last straw - she went to the university Chancellor and complained of sexual harassment. She indicated she was nervous and uncomfortable around the scientist after she refused his advances. In an article about this case, the author portrayed this woman as a "bitch," claiming she was only trying to get money from the university, and that the scientist was totally "innocent" in his actions. What do you think? Is the scientist's behavior sexual harassment?
In the U.S., many sexual harassment cases are brought and immediately thrown out of court. It's a pity that people abuse the laws, causing a lot of burden, wasted resources and money for employers, who are obligated to investigate the seriousness of such claims.
In real life dating and gender relations, these claims aren't relevant. You can't take a man to court for flirting with you, asking you out, staring at your boobs or ass, or even making inappropriate remarks. If someone grabs you, or touches you, I guess you could file a claim for assault or battery and maybe prevail. This doesn't mean an American woman won't smack you or yell at you for such actions. :) Over the years, many States have also enacted "stalker" laws to protect women and men from extreme cases of unwanted pursuit.
How does it work in Russia? Are there laws to protect against sexual harassment? Have you had any experience with naughty bosses or professors?
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По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:05 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:06 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:11 pm (UTC)А секс и секс на работе это норма, так как , кто не любит секс?
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:15 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:19 pm (UTC)Это нормальная жизнь, гормоны, и вы не когда не добьетесь правды,
Жизнь как жизнь, не более.
Все ваши движения бред. Мужчины хотят всегда.
Выход один - нас кастрировать. Выхода нет.
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:20 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 10:14 pm (UTC)Поэтому наверное ты всё-таки ёбаный в рот кацап
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:20 pm (UTC)А давай все на своих языках будут писать? Например украинский тоже многие понимают и что с того?
ЭТО РУ ЗОНА, для вас - наглосаксонской погани есть специальная зона в ЖЖ - там и калякай свои высеры для дебилов на своем поганом языке. Или, иди, убей себя об стену, сделае многим одолжение этим.
Хороший наглосакс=мертвый наглосакс.
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:21 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:28 pm (UTC)иди, гнида фашисткая, рой схрон, скоро буде жарко, очень.
твой президент - фашист и убийца №1 в мире и затеял третью мировую войну - вас презирает вся планета
желаю твоей нации столько же крови пролить, сколько из-за вас мразей гибнет русских людей в Новороссии.
смерть идет за вами гниды наглосаксонские, будьте вы прокляты во веки веков!
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 07:31 pm (UTC)Re: По
From:Re: По
From:Re: По
From:Re: По
From:Re: По
From:To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: To the ban for your thick trolling!
From:Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 08:34 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 08:35 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-06 02:43 am (UTC)I feel sorry for him.
But I really like your journal and it's a shame that you been through all that craziness of modern russian people. :(
Re: По
From:Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 09:27 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-06 05:40 am (UTC)errexx - хуйлопская пидарасина
Date: 2015-02-05 08:55 pm (UTC)Или ты своего хуйлопского названия сисьняисся, чмо экстрахромосомное?
Re: errexx - хуйлопская пидарасина
Date: 2015-02-05 09:14 pm (UTC)Re: errexx - хуйлопская пидарасина
Date: 2015-02-05 09:36 pm (UTC)Если ты у меня его спиздил, это не делает его твоим :)
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 09:21 pm (UTC)<наглосаксонской погани>
<Хороший наглосакс=мертвый наглосакс.>
Гоблокамрад детектед.
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-06 09:17 am (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 08:31 pm (UTC)Like you can write in Russian, 5 mistakes, ain't that too many?
This way's better: Писать нужно по-русски! А секс это нормально.
Re: По
Date: 2015-02-05 09:02 pm (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-07 04:26 am (UTC)Re: По
Date: 2015-02-07 04:25 am (UTC)языке сделать три орфографические ошибки?
"И эти люди запрещают мне ковыряться в носу!" (ц)