Confused, Naive American - Explain Chechen Wedding Scandal!

[peacetraveler22]

We all recognize that there are eccentric and deranged people in all parts of the globe, engaged in questionable behavior which we'll never understand or condone. I once thought of visiting Grozny, so perhaps some of you would even place me in one, or both, of these categories. Remember a few years ago, I wrote this post, asking readers whether it's safe for an American woman to travel to Chechnya? Some of my friends in the Russian blogosphere have been there, and even personally met Kadyrov and told me it was safe. All of them - MEN. You can call me a naive or misinformed American, but I can't understand yesterday's events.

I read the scandalous news that Kadyrov granted special permission for an old Police Chief to marry a 17 year old bride! I will not place a photo of the sad, distraught young woman in my blog to further sensationalize her image. On her wedding day, her eyes completely devoid of joy, as if going to a funeral or gas chamber. You've already seen her expressions, her white dress, and the bejeweled head covering, all draped around the delicate frame of a young woman who likely had no say in the events of that day, or in picking her groom. What a sad existence, I'm sorry I can't imagine it, or respect any region where such actions are considered acceptable, and personally authorized by the leader!! I read a lot of stories and comments about this topic today, and I'm particularly disgusted by the post written by Ilya Varlamov, LJ's top Russian blogger, where he can't understand all the fuss or controversy over the wedding.  How can a modern, intelligent man like him not question this event, particularly when he has a young daughter of his own?

Here in the U.S., we have various religious sects engaged in polygamy, many marrying very young brides. The distinction is that our leaders don't advocate or approve of such behavior, nor does most of American society. On some other news sites, I read comments by a few Chechen females stating that the bride's facial expression was normal, that Muslim women don't show overt expression, even during a wedding. According to them, such action would be considered immodest in strict Muslim families.

What do you think of this scandal? Please help me understand "real" Chechen culture and mentality better, not what well-known bloggers show on their hand held tours, organized by Chechen officials. Yes, I know about the Chechen wars and that it's a Muslim region in the North Caucasus, yet it's still part of Russia. I'm especially interested to hear from any female readers I might have living in this area. Help me restore my faith in this region..

Comments

[maadmike.livejournal.com]

I am not telling that it is bad I'm not a prude, no judge for everybody, but for Muslims which are the focus of a critique in this post, it is a shame and dishonor. I am telling that it is not possible to measure everything around on our mother Earth with our own ruler...

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

Forced marriage and sexual slavery should never be accepted, by the measure of any ruler.

[maadmike.livejournal.com]

Why are you so sure it is forced marriage, was you speaking to this girl?
When in EU officials take children from their parents on trumped up charges and there is perspective that these children will be adopted by the gays - I can say that it should never be accepted...

[peacetraveler22.livejournal.com]

Why do you care if a child is raised by a same sex couple, if they provide a loving, caring and stable environment for the child to grow up in? You would rather them be raised by delinquent, heterosexual parents?

[maadmike.livejournal.com]

There were the cases in EU, when it was not obvious that parents was a delinquent in some way and a lot of cases in USA, when they were and nobody gave a damn. But my point was not in something special I don't like in West people or Muslims right now. Although it is always good to discuss everything. What is strange that Americans are decoupling of wars around the world and are to blame in so many criminals acts and meaningless deaths, think there are only have right to dictate how people should live, what they should believe in, and the main focus for their attempts is the past Soviet Union's countries. They don't see no problems in their allies countries like Saudi Arabia. Look there, don't it easy to find something strange about marriage or their view on law? :)

[buddhistmind.livejournal.com]

Most of Russian population live below the poverty line. There is more than 500 000 orphans in Russia (in America and Western Europe - none).

What do you say about this? How these people living below the poverty line treat themselves and raise their children psychologically, in terms of personal relationships, co-being and physical health? Are they very happy and proud? They are, I'm sure.

Why aren't you elaborating at length how to fight this monstrous poverty of most Russians and point the finger on Europe or America instead? You don't understand that this monstrous poverty is all you should constantly think about?

[buddhistmind.livejournal.com]

Man, I heard that Muslims of Dagestan, Chechnya etc. think that it is ok to have sex with girls before a marriage - but only the anal type of sex - in order not to deprive a girl of her virginity. And some religious leaders even approve of this.

And I know for sure they actually do this.

That's much more disgusting than masturbating on/to (i.e. having a conjured image of someone during the process) anyone or anything.

[maadmike.livejournal.com]

It is not for me you should apply but to a sexologist... men... ;)

[buddhistmind.livejournal.com]

Chechen and Dagestani people you mean, not me.